Friday, 22 February 2013

Something Else That Drives Me Crazy... Potholes

By Lucy Felthouse

Oh dear, I seemed to have developed a real liking for ranting. So here I am again, having a moan about potholes, this time. I've included the details on my latest release underneath, though, so you've got some light relief afterwards ;)

Sooo... potholes. Totally rife at this time of year. Very annoying, dangerous and potentially extremely expensive. My dad was at a garage recently (a non-pothole related tyre replacement) and he saw a total knackered wheel - yes, the wheel as well as the tyre was totally fucked. Turns out the driver had hit a pothole in a local village - a very posh village, actually, with a private school. Apparently, even having toffs milling about obviously isn't enough to make the council cough up.

The thing that annoys me about potholes is the fact that as a person that owns a car, and therefore pays an extortionate amount of car tax, I've already paid for the road repairs. Myself and however many other millions of motorists are putting money in the banks of the respective councils, whether or not anything needs doing to the roads or not. It does, of course, as potholes are an ongoing problem that will never be stopped unless some boffin invents a new road surface that doesn't crack and crumble. Of course, if they did, it would be deemed too expensive to  use, anyway, although it would no doubt pay for itself within a year or two.

They're not so bad on local roads, where the speed limit is much lower, as the motorist has time to see the pothole and take measures to avoid it. Obviously, swerving isn't always possible, if traffic is on the other side of the road, or if the road is narrow, but if you absolutely have to go through a pothole, a crawl is much better than a zoom, naturally. Even then they judder the entire car and the people in it, which still can't be doing much good for the vehicle - through no fault of the driver's.

What does drive me completely mad and also scares me is potholes on dual carriageways and motorways. I use a busy dual carriageway and motorway on a regular basis, and they're currently both riddled with potholes. I've even described some of them as craters, they're so bloody big. And on those fast roads, they're a death trap, in my opinion. In daylight, you can see them and take preventative action - again, if you have enough room to manoeuvre around them - but some appear from nowhere, and before you know it, you've thundered up and down a horrible bump and your teeth are rattling. And you're also pretty paranoid that you've buggered up your tyres, your wheels, your suspension or something else. And it's not your fault.

In the dark, it's terrifying. You know they're there, but because there's traffic everywhere, you can't put on your full beam lights, so the holes really do appear out of nowhere, and you don't have enough time to avoid them. I've spent several journeys now, gripping onto the steering wheel for dear life, and hoping I don't hit a crater.

And as for people going too fast, well, I'm surprised there haven't been more accidents. Some of the holes are genuinely big enough that I bet if someone hit them wrong, they could end up flipping their car over. And imagine the damage that could cause - to people, to cars, to lives. But of course, it could happen to someone doing the speed limit, too. Someone could just get unlucky, and then all hell would break loose.

You may be able to apply to have councils to pay for tyres and car repairs because of the shitty road surfaces, but what amount of money is going to replace the loss of life? Come on councils, pull your socks up. I know money's tight, but motorists are pre-paying for these bloody repairs to keep us safe and mobile, and you're not doing them. Sooner or later, something really bad is going to happen, and that's going to be on you.

P.S. Yes, most of the potholes are on the inside lanes, so common sense would say additional traffic and heavier vehicles are making the problem worse. As a result, middle-lane-hoggers are actually pretty sensible to stay where they are - for once, I can't blame them!


Four kinky and erotic BDSM tales from the smutty pen of Lucy Felthouse.

Balancing the Books
Philip’s a well off man, and doesn’t need a job. But when he sees the gorgeous owner of his local bookshop, he applies for the role that’s being advertised there immediately. He’s totally stricken by the stunning Giovanna, and when it turns out she wants to boss him around in a sexual sense as well as an employment sense, he has no intention of refusing.

Feeling the Heat
Taylor and Maisie’s car has broken down. Luckily, Taylor’s handy with engines and is working hard to get them back on the road. Unfortunately, Maisie is getting annoyed at the amount of time he’s spending in the garage and confronts him. Instead of arguing back, though, Taylor comes up with an ingenious plan to keep Maisie quiet.

The Perfect Dom
Part of Mia’s nightwear is a pair of hotpants with SPANK ME emblazoned across the arse. Normally, that wouldn’t be a problem, but when she forgets that she has a houseguest and heads to the kitchen for a drink, she’s shocked to find Alex in her living room. Immediately spotting what he sees as an invitation written across Mia’s bottom, Alex makes an offer and Mia soon discovers that he is, in fact, the perfect dom.

Meet Me at the Spanish Steps
Darby is working at a holiday camp on the outskirts of Rome and is getting along just fine, with the exception of her sex life. For various reasons, she’s not getting what she wants in the bedroom, and her tastes are very particular. She turns to the Internet to get what she needs, and when she discovers William, it seems that he’s more than willing—and capable—of scratching that particular itch.

More info, excerpt and buy links:


Lucy Felthouse is a very busy woman! She writes erotica and erotic romance in a variety of subgenres and pairings, and has over seventy publications to her name, with many more in the pipeline. These include Best Bondage Erotica 2012 and 2013, and Best Women's Erotica 2013. Another string to her bow is editing, and she has edited and co-edited a number of anthologies. She owns Erotica For All, and is book editor for Cliterati. Find out more at Join her on Facebook and Twitter, and subscribe to her newsletter at:


  1. Potholes are a problem here, too. Councils couldn't give a stuff and only do temporary repair jobs, which really turn out to be temporary botch jobs. Hence they then need to increase our council tax. It's a vicious circle and the general public will never win.

    CJ x

  2. Interesting assortment of labels for the pothole post, Lucy. Made me smile. ;)



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